not-so-live from London

Am back from a 16-day trip to London, Oxford, Cambridge and Scotland... t'was a really really blessed break from work, with lots of R&R and time with God.

I like to pack my day with activities and people to avoid too much intense (and depressing) thought, but whilst getting around on my own I found ample opportunity to sit still and listen to my Abba's voice :) Smth that I've been grasping at for months now that really solidified on this trip: I've been agonising about whether or not to do the PhD, where to go if I do it, where to go if I don't... then I realised that I'd been putting too much 'faith' in a future that is yet unknown; that all I really needed to do was to step out in the assurance that my future is in the palm of His hand. And the future is GOOD :)

Quite unintuitive, this idea that total surrender is required for some control of the future... but while we can't claim to understand all His ways (and never will), that shouldn't stop us from marveling. As Thomas Hardy put it: "Let me enjoy the earth no less / Because the all-enacting Might / That fashioned forth its loveliness / Had other aims than my delight."

Also alot more revelations on love and life (ask me for them!)... and renewed appreciation for good food, good rest, and friendships that have stood the test of time. Real refreshment for the soul =)

Thanks much to Enqi baby, Rachel, Kenneth, Alwyn, MZn, Jia-yan, Audry, Wanting and Weiying for hosting and entertaining me - you guys are the best!!